VIRUSES ARCHAEA BACTERIA MADNESS SPARTA BLAH BLAH BLAH.

Viruses! They're fantastic! But not as fantastic as the music I'm listening to right now, but ahem. Viruses.

Viruses can kill all of humankind if we don't have a reproductive system. They can. And they will. They have a plan. They will get better at it. Who will triumph? Us, or viruses? Probably us, but guys, do you think viruses will adapt to everything we throw at them? Think about it.

We have high chances of surviving against viruses with our current tech.

Have you gotten your flu vaccines yet? You should. You will need that. Think about the vaccine as a syringe putting little target practice things into your body, telling the cells that "THESE ARE THE ENEMY. THEY ARE TOP PRIORITY. IGNORE THEM AND WE WILL POSSIBLY DIE." It's like an army sergeant. TEN HUT SOLDIERS, WE ARE GOING TO KILL THOSE FLU VIRUSES BECAUSE THEY WILL KILL US IF WE DO NOT! AM I CLEAR MARINES! Sir Yes Sir! THEN DAMN RIGHT I AM. NOW RALLY UP! ITS GO TIME!

Sexual Reproduction? WHAT DO YOU MEAN SEXUAL REPRODUCTION? WAT? Oh that sexual reproduction. Yeah.

All of you people without babies, GET BABIES! Spread your genes! Marry someone and get a child! You will need that child! That child has the same job as you! Get another child. Guess how long that's gone. More than 10,000 years, mah man.

Hyenas have a female dominated system, as I said before. The female hyenas have a very strange clitoris called a Pseudo-Penis. Strange, I know. Ducks have a corkscrew Pseudo-Penis. Google that with care, my friend! Google it with care.

Pseudo-Penis is a weird name. At least we don't have one.

Us males are born to be awesome! Seriously. I'm not kidding. We are automatically programmed to try to be more awesome than the other people. For the ladies. The most awesome person gets the ladies. Girls can be awesome, but they don't need to! That's great because we have to be awesome, and that's hard work.

Sexual Reproduction is interesting. And, as everyone says, and yes, that's where the word comes from, sexy. Hyuk hyuk. Yeah.

If you want a pic of a duck's Pseudo-Penis in this blog, then you better vote for it, as that penis is the worst thing ever known in the world. It doesn't even look like a penis. Yet it's still gross! For now, I'll give you a picture of a corkscrew, if you are to be satisfied. Ok? Ok.

FDSLFJDSLFHSDLKFHDSLFHDLS WEIRDLY AWKWARD RANDOM THING I HOPE HANS DOES NOT SEE THIS.

A penis is important! The other sexual organ that females have is good too, but if I even mention the name, I'd kill myself. And then with my soul, I'd pick up my knife, cut out my heart and put it in the fridge. And preserve it so I can put it in a robot in the future! But I should save my brain too. Good idea! Yeah! Yeah, as I was saying, sexual organs are very important.

It is important to make more of myself! Exactly what i'm going to do!

There are lots of animals that like to die! Like lemmings! They kill themselves for the next generation! Woo! Kill yourselves lemmings! For the future!

My dog had babies! But about 2 years after that it died. Poor doggie. Let's hope you're chewing bones in heaven, little girl.

Alpha males are more common than alpha females, but there are some alpha females out there. Like hyenas! Yeah.....

Most male animals can reproduce thousands of times per day! It's their job, so hey, let them do it!

Everything and everyone has sex at least once in their lives! The only disorder that stops them from having sex is being a virgin. SO GET OUT THERE AND REPRODUCE! DARNIT YOU NEED KIDS!

Yeah, don't reproduce. You won't be known around the world as one of the many people who had sex!

WHY DON'T YOU CARE ABOUT THESE GLANDS! THEY GIVE YOU THE LADIES AND THEY GET YOU SEX! NOW LET ME TALK ABOUT THIS,YOU SCUMBAG, BECAUSE WE ARE GOING TO TALK ABOUT THE BLOODY ENDOCRINE SYSTEM! THIS TITLE IS GETTING SO LONG! WHO THE HELL CARES ANYWAY! THIS IS GONNA GET AS LONG AS THE POST SO IM GONNA STOP NOW! OK?! OK!

Our glands are amazing! They give us pimples, they make us hate our parents, and worst of all, they make us commit suicide, if pushed enough. So you hate your glands, don't you? Well, they are extremely important, which you will find out later!

We have glands in our pee pee. Oh wait, that's not the way you say it. We have glands in our sexual organs. They are important. Very important.

The Pituitary gland is important. But it's about the size of a pea. You heard that right, a pea. Pea Pea!

This is kinda weird, but if babies cry, that activates milk production in the breasts? So, women. Don't hear baby crying. You'll waste useful energy.

The thyroid gland manages a lot of stuff. It's also very important. It's also in your neck. Weird.

Gonads are weird. We both have them. Even you, ladies. Even you. Nobody is left out.

Your Glands are weird. They all have jobs. Some tell your heart to beat faster. Others tell you to start makin' dat breast milk! All the glands have jobs. Sweat glands and salivary glands make watery stuff. They are called saliva and sweat. Sweat is salty, saliva is a digesting liquid which is AMAZING. It can't do much without the teeth, because, if there ever was a digesting race between saliva and stomach acid, the stomach acid would win by a longshot.

Your Testosterone is made by your Testes. That's why it's called Testosterone! Geddit Geddit? Well, maybe not.

Muscular men need testosterone! Steroids have testosterone in them. Steroids might give you too much testosterone. Steroids are bad. Baaaaad.

Glands are very important. Without our glands, we would just not be the same. NOT THE SAME!

Hormones! Those things that give you growth spurts and....... Stuff.
Hee hee, look at that fracking cat.

My glands make me do weird stuff. I mean, like weird. Like jumping off your balcony! And hurting yourself. A bit. Actually, It didn't hurt much. But you see what your hormones and glands make you do? Damn.

Napoleon wasn't very small! It's a myth! Which means the pituitary gland is not your body's Napoleon!

The pituitary glands controls the adrenal glands, which control the kidneys.

Adrenaline is made by the adrenal glands, you need adrenaline to get a shock and run!

Your pancreas is the biggest gland. Yep, its a gland. If you did not know that, then see? It's pretty big eh?

Gonads are the sex glands. The Testes and the Ovaries. If you think that's gross, then you're right. LOL.

Embryologists are weird. They cut out gonads!

When you are in the embryo, your embryo is automatically set to make it female! But if your body manually turns it into a male, then that means... YOU'LL BE A MALE! SIMPLE!

Your sex hormones pretty much define themselves. They make you want to have....... sex. Duh.

There may be a dream you're having about your girlfriend right now because of your hormones.........

BUT THIS IS SCIENCE, PAY ATTENTION.

Your hormones do not make you try to kill people. Actually, they do. But if you're Lucius, son of Satan, then that means you must have a lot of hormones. But you're probably not. Because with your telekinesis powers, you could make me pour that oil on myself and make me set a match. Wait, what are you.......... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

Ok, I actually wrote this a long time ago. I just started again now. I forgot about it in that fire. Oh my god it burns. Still does.

Oh, and speaking of horrifying stress, your adrenaline glands are needed in stressful moments. Like when I almost died in that fire. Even by thinking about that moment, adrenaline pumps into my veins.

Hormones are things that make you have growth spurts and acne. So......... WHEN YOU BECOME A TEEN, WATCH OUT, BECAUSE YOU WILL GROW THROUGH THE CEILING AND THEN BE COVERED IN SPOTS.

Wait, that's not it. It's a little lower than that. You just grow a little and then you get a lot of spots around your body. Horrible, horrible spots. I bet you are experiencing it right now (or you experienced it in the past)

Hormones sometimes make you bloodthirsty! That's why we invaded enemy villages a long time ago. You want to become Lucius. I'll just inject a lot of those hormones into you. And then I'll teach you how to be stealthy. And then I'll bribe the devil to give you mind control, combustion, telekinesis and a huge planning brain. Then you can be Lucius. Oh, and random person, I just did that to your son. Good luck.








































































































                                                                                           Good Luck Indeed.

YOU SEE THIS CRAP? THIS CRAP IS THE BLOODY IMMUNE SYSTEM, YOU BLOODY CRAPBAG, YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THIS CRAP, NOW READ, OR ELSE ILL KILL YOU AND CRAP IN YOUR HEAD

Don't die. That's the aim of life. Dont damn die.

I like to nod die. I have a lots of way to not die. Like living. Watching movies. Feeding myself. Watching Movies doesn't really help, but hey, I eat popcorn.

Bacteria is all like: I am bad, and that’s good. I will never be good, and that’s not bad. There’s no one I’d rather be than me. While cells are all like: GTFO Bacteria, GET OUT! JUST GET OUT! WE'LL KILL YOU! DIE (THIS CENSOR IS FOR SANE IDIOTS)!

If you get a splinter in your toe, the assassins come in. Those assassins are called white blood cells. They slit the throats of the bacteria. Like a boss.

Natural Born Killers. That's another name for White Blood Cells. They were born to kill all bacteria. Really, Bacteria are innocent. The thing they do is try to reproduce. But they do something bad. And they do that. Hence"I am bad, and that’s good. I will never be good, and that’s not bad. There’s no one I’d rather be than me."

Not dying is important to do every single day. Do not jump out of planes. Do not go into active combat zones. Do not eat bad food. Do not become a Necromorph. Do not find out that your girlfriend has turned into a zombie too late. Do not hallucinate that your now-zombie GF is on your spaceship. Do not do any of that stuff. Thank you.

White Blood cells are like assassins, they eat all bacteria. But they die after doing that about 100 times. Which doesn't seem like much fun. So your white blood cells are good at their job.

You might be allergic to stuff. So that's why you tell your friends if you put peanuts in your cookies.

Phagocytes are amazing. They eat and eat and EAT. Their mission? Destroy all invaders. And destroy all rogue cells. We shall kill all bacteria! And cancer cells! They are the dead percent.

Your Immune System helps you not die.

White blood cells excrete the worst possible thing. It comes out of zombie's mouths. It comes out of that last guy's eyes a few days after that murder. It's pus! Beautiful pus. Pus that comes out of your rotting gash that you're gonna die from. Pus that comes out of your blisters. Pus! An ode to pus.

Blood is not made to come out of your cuts. Blood is made to go around your body. It's like a cell highway, which is protected by the white blood cell cops.

Red blood cells transport air to your heart. They are also what makes your blood red. You want to see blood without red blood cells in it? Just go to the sea! It's everywhere.

Pus may be scary, but it's good stuff. It's the dead bodies of that bacteria that the WBC just killed.

A lot of microbes literally want to kill you. Literally. Seriously. Don't get me wrong, these guys are micro-murderers.

But these tiny micro-murderers are caught and killed by the micro-assassin-cells! The WBC!

Every animal has an innate immune system, but we are born with the innate and learning kind.

Skin is good at keeping your organs in, but it's made to keep stuff out. Outta your beautiful system!

Do you want to die? Well you know what dying is like? First up, everything starts to go white. Then your mind starts to go away. And then oh no! You're dead. Very dead. And then you can't think about anything! And that would be boring. Except it's not, because you can't think about it being boring! And that makes it even more boring! Death sucks. And that's why we have our immune system! Next question.

I love our immune system! But suicide just destroys the point. So please, stop killing yourselves!

It's possible to wallow in filth without dying because of your skin! But if you are bitten by a rabid dog and didn't get your shots..... It was nice knowing ya, reader.

Most bacteria can't get past your awesome skin! But as you get older, it gets easier for attackers to, well, attack.

Phagocytes are amazing. They help! Eat all that bacteria, Phagocytes!

Marcophages are the bodyguards of the organs. They do not let bacteria get in your gut. Over their dead body!

Natural Killer cells are amazing! They do what they are called.

Antigen means Antibody Generator.

Antibodies attack in groups, but that still doesn't mean they can kill the bacteria. It's like Boomer Bile in Left 4 Dead. Antibodies tell the WBC where the bacteria is. And then they swarm them. And kill them.

Helper T cells are the alerting cells. They clean up. If a cell gets infected, then they say "There are problems here! We got a problem here at sector 15!"

Cytotoxic T cells are the executioners, the mercy killers. They kill infected cells.

OH MY BULLCRAP! Muscles!

Muscles are everywhere in your body, and they are being used during every second of your life, the heart being the most used muscle, probably. Well, it needs to beat for about 90 years, don't you think that's hard work?!

The longest muscle in your body goes down your leg, the bigger you are, the longer it is. Actually, that kinda counts for all muscles.

The Skeletal Muscles are the muscles on the outside. They are the ones that are exposed if you peel your skin off like a banana. Try it! Wait..... Actually, don't try it. Please.

Your muscles are really bloody. And if you are a chicken, your muscle would taste great deep fried with canola oil, served with a crispy outside and some fries. Yeah.... "Drool"

If your muscles were exposed to the outside world, and yes, it would really hurt, everyone could see every detail of your muscles.

Muscles are needed for a lot of stuff, including chewing, touching, sleeping, surviving, breathing, living, creating, writing, fighting, gaming, shirt throwing, beer drinking, and finally, the most important thing, thumpadumping.

Muscles contract and relax.

Muscles are thicker in the middle.

Chickens have bigger muscles than we do? Looks like it.

We have quite a bit of meat on our bones, I get why cannibals like to eat us.

Flesh is just some kind of muscle! So meat is muscle. Your tongue is a muscle. ALMOST EVERYTHING IS YOUR MUSCLES!

We didn't have a good understanding of muscle until the 15th century, but we didn't even know how muscles worked until 1954! Shocked? You should be.

If you think you don't use your muscles much, you are WRONG. You use a lot of muscles even when you sit on that cheap, junky couch watching your tiny, static-plagued TV, eating chips. Ha!

Big guns are needed to do strong stuff. Like lifting weights, and other heavy things.

Your muscles are very good at their job, even though that they do only 2 things!

Ligaments are similar to tendons, except they connect bones to other bones.

Tendons are thick, we have some in our heels, it's called the Achilles' Heel. It really hurts when you whack it. Also, it was the fabled weak point of Achilles. Which an arrow got shot in. Which killed him.

There is a lot of contracting and relaxing in your muscle jobs, they didn't sign up for much.

Exercising helps your muscles by hurting them, and then they heal and get stronger. Therefore, don't OVEREXCERCISE!

Huxley is an overused last name. Andrew Fielding Huxley tried to find out about muscles. And, yes, his last name is Huxley. Told you it was an overused surname. Totally overused. Nah, he's related to the Huxley family.

You would not be able to move without your muscles or your skeleton. So you need both. But some animals don't need the skeletons, like the slug, the snail and the sea cucumber.

You have 640 skeletal muscles, which means we don't count muscles like the heart. But that's a lot, amirite? iamrite.

The squeezy part of your body is muscles, you can squeeze them, but you can't squeeze skeletons. You can break your skeleton, if you really try. But don't. Please.

It is possible for bacteria to get to your bloodstream through a small cut in your skin. You can die, even get just a small cut.

Your heart can skip a beat, which is a weird feeling. But your heart can overbeat, creating a heart attack. Uh Oh.

As you get older, your muscles get harder to move.

Muscles are bloody everywhere. And yes, they are really bloody.

Cells need food to grow! So we need meat to grow our muscles. Eat your meat! Eat eat eat!

By the way, nice rhyme, eh? Hahaha.

Could you peel back your skin and send the photo to me so I can observe muscles? Here's my email: thisistotallynotafakeaccount@gmail.com.

Rip apart those muscles! Tear them apart and stuff them in your mouth! I'm talking about chicken muscle of course. It's delicious! Just don't eat too much.

Meat is the #1 thing we love to eat. Veggies, we don't need much of them, but we need lots of meat! And lots of water! If you don't eat meat, your muscles will not grow, and you will be weak! But before that you would probably die of hunger. It's possible!

You can die of too much strength! It's a real thing!

Jean Hanson and Hugh Exmor Huxley also found out about the muscles.

Muscles are truly worth learning about. Because they are one of the many important parts of your big, big, complicated body.

Your Gluteus Maximus is your buttcheek. Hate to break it to ya, not all of your muscles are cool.

One of our bones can move in relation to your other bone. Why? Because of muscles.

Your skeletal muscle is a rope. Made out of smaller ropes. Which are made out of even smaller ropes.

We cannot see muscle fibers. They are as thin as a cell. So now you know how many muscle cells are in meat. Well, you don't, actually. Take a good guess.

SEX! Now that  I got your attention, it's time to tell you about the Huxleys. MUHUHUAHUAHAHAHAHAHA!

The Huxleys are good at discovering stuff. One Huxley was Darwin's bulldog. The others tried to discover more about muscles.

Our muscle strings are like springs. They contract and stretch.

SHOOP THE WHOOPING SKELETAN

A baculum is in any Mammal's little willy. It's a penis bone. But we don't have it, interestingly.

Polar Bears have a streamlined skull, which helps them swim in water. Unlike a Grizzly's skull.

You don't need to be a vertebrate to have a skeleton, skeleton means bone, not a spinal cord.

Molting is very terrible.

You have at least 32 teeth.

There are a few bones in your ear. And there is one bone in your throat. Behind your Mandible.

There are lots of bones in your body.

Ancient Romans were awesome. According to people in Ye Olde times.

Romans prohibited the dissection of humans. Which meant romans did not have a good view of what humans looked like.

The local judge usually gave away dead bodies of prisoners to the first person ever to dissect a human.

Most of the secrets in life are bound under human skin.

Placental mammals are pretty gross, because they give birth in a weird way.

Pronghorn Antelope's horns are very amazing, because they are removable.

The Skeleton is not the dead part of us, it is vital. We need it. It protects your organs, and it holds your structure together.

In Alaska, Baculums were used as handles for weapons, and are sometimes sold as souvenirs to people who visit. Gross, but cool. The largest one in existence, as claimed by the owner, was sold for $8,000.

The hardest parts of our body are, wait for it, wait for it, our skeleton.

The largest bone in your body is your Femur. Once again, no, we do not have a Baculum.

We may not have a penis bone, but other primates do! Why? The question is, why?

Spider Monkeys do not have a Baculum either. What is going on here?

Your bones have marrow in them, which is pretty tasty.

Baculums sold by the Alaskans are called Oosiks. They are usually fossilized, and they can be over 1000 years old!

Baculums help with Sexual Intercourse, but we have something else that I would rather not talk about.

Why am I leaving out the ladies? Female animals also have bones to help with Sexual Intercourse. Not sure if the ladies in our species have it though. So calling all scientists!

Exoskeletons are very heavy. Which means you never see an ant the size of an Elephant.

You have 26 bones in each foot.

Talking about the skeleton is a breeze! I should have highlighted it before!

Everyone loves organs! Well, maybe not you. Or you. Or maybe even you. And all you ladies.

Our organs are gross, aren't they. Nope.

Remember, evolution is real. It's not just Charles Darwin making a deal with Satan. Shut up.

Your skin protects you, but it doesn't count as a skeleton.

Rhino Heads are good for being giant. LOL.

Keratin is awesome, we need it to make out nails and hair, and animals need it for their horns.

I dunno if Keratin counts as a bone, but if it does, then I should be talking about it.

There are lots of bones in your body. A lot of bones are in your face, only a few are in your arm, a lot are in your hands and feet, and finally, the ribs count as bones, which means your chest has a huge amount of bones.

If you have a skeleton in your class, try to observe it. It has screws in it, doesn't it! That's because your muscles hold your bones together. So it's all a you help me I help you situation. :)

Everything we used to know about bones was wrong. Because we believed the romans. Turned out they were idiots.

Why do Rhinos have big heads? Their skulls are just like elephant skulls!

Streamlined skulls are awesome! Woohoo! Swimmin like a boss! Oppa's Polar Bear Style.

We don't have a very cool skull, but that doesn't mean we are awesome monsters.

We are the only ones who can dance! We can even dance to Oppa's Gangnam Style.

So that means our skeletal system is pretty great, don't you think.

We are very smart, and if we want to stay that way, we must have a nice, hard skull.

We need energy to move our bones, if we don't have energy, the only thing holding us together would be our skeleton. Our skeleton can't handle itself though.

One of the few bones that only the muscles hold up is your Mandible! It's the first thing to rot off when you're dead.

Some of your bones are not even bones! We have cartilage in our nose and places like that.

Bye for 3 weeks! Bye!

The Very Gross Excretory System.

Your body is using the urinary system right now. Really.

If you do not eat, you die. If your food gets kept in your body, you get a horrible stomachache. So remember, do not hold IT in.

White stuff in the bird poop is the pee. So it isn't all poop. It's pee and poop. Gross.

Do not put your nephrons end to end. It will heavily damage you. But if you do do that (you poor man), it will stretch over 80 kilometres. Very far. You could stretch across a highway with it. Cool eh? But a little gross.

Ladies, Men, they pee from different places. We both have 2 holes. One for peeing, and one for pooping. Our excretory system ends right there. The holes are in different places though. According to your gender. But i'd rather not talk about the holes right now, let's just talk about something else tomorrow!
The Excretory System and The Digestive System.

There is a lot of terrible stuff that can get in your stomach, and your excretory system's job is to get rid of it. So it gets rid of all of the now-sapped-of-energy food and the poison in it.

By the way, I was wrong last time, your stomach actually has acid-proof goop on it, the whole thing isn't really acid-proof.

If you have bad bacteria in your body, your stomach might just try to rush it out quickly, so your poop gets runny. You may hate it, but it's just your stomach's failsafe.

Renal Cortex means Renal BARK. Gross, but cool at the same time. Haha!

I say by the way too much, but you just gotta know this. Your bladder is where your pee is contained. May I use the proper term for pee and poop? Yeah. Faeces and Urine.

Your anus is where the faeces comes out. Your anus is your butt, if you were wondering.

Our organs are very good at their job, because they don't take breaks. Unless you're dead. Then they take a LONG break.

Even the word Excretory seems gross to me. Doesn't it seem gross to you?! If not, I'd hate to break it to you, you should think it's gross.

Your pee is water, heheheh.

Your pee is yellower according to how much you drink. If your pee is red, well, then you have a problem. I think you should see a doctor. If you have weird poop, then think about what you had the last time you ate. Beets?

Beets is the 100th word I said.

Our organs, cut up and stretched, could stretch a LOT longer than even our height. Weird eh?

You might die if one of your organs shut down.

Some organs are more important than others.

Mucus and Pus are gross, you shouldn't even touch it.

There is lots of awesome things happening in your body, the excretory system is only one of them.

Your pee is yellower if you drink less.

Do you not like being peed on? Then avoid bird poop, because that is not just poop, that is both the bird's excretements.

We absorb a lot of energy, but the stuff that isn't absorbed turns into poop.

Your excretory system starts with the food getting sapped of it's energy. And after that, the water gets sucked out of the now-sapped food, giving you more water, not enough to survive, but enough for the body to be happy. Then it gets passed down to your anus, where the now sapped and water-sucked food gets excreted from your very complicated body. Where pee goes, that's another story. And I am not talking about it. Sorry men! I hope you learnt more about the excretory system through this!

Your excretory system is very weird. But that doesn't mean that it isn't important. It is important!

There are lots of parts in your digestive system. Your excretory system is the continuation of the digestive system.

Every mammal has a excretory system, ok? This is one of the true things about mammals, unlike all the other stuff I told you! Kidding, kidding.

Antisteve is scary, I made him.

Lots of animals have an excretory system, and they're not afraid to use it. LOL.

We are very bad at naming things, so that's why all our names are so complicated. John. Jo-hn.
J-o-h-n Geohhne.

Our kidneys are very important.

Do you want a kidney transplant? Go to egypt.

Henle is impossible to gross out, he loved to dissect eyeballs, kidneys and brains, plus he was a big fan of mucus and pus.

Pus is gross, it has blood in it. Really. BYE HOPE YOU LIKED THIS POST!

Digestive System

The Digestive System is great. I like it. Because i love to eat. EAT! NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM! :)

And after that, all of the cake is gone, in my stomach.

Puke digestive system goo onto something!

By the way, it's impossible to take back the skin of your head to show off your skull through your mouth without dying.

You taste because you have to eat, the better it is for you, the better it tastes! It's true! Believe me! By the way, Carver dies. Bethany dies. Your choice. Either way, it's Hawke's fault.

You cannot digest all things. If you swallow a huge bundle of rebar, you would not be able to digest it. And you would die because your esophagus would get destroyed.

By the way, it is not possible to eat anally. DONT EVEN TRY IT.

Your mouth is made for eating. Your esophagus is for swallowing. Your stomach is made for digesting. Do not do it the other way around, or else you just might poop out of your mouth (JK)

We process foods. Through our digestive system. It's fun to digest!

There is something that blocks your respiratory system, which stops food from going down it, that is dangerous, if that happened, chances are that YOU WILL DIE!

If you digest, then that means your body turns your food into the stuff! THE STUFF!
They will turn into the STUFF! STUFF! But that's another story. If you want to learn about pee and poop, you will have to wait for another week!

By the way, food isn't really romantic. Problem? HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Do you want to puke digestive system over your lunch? No? Then do not become a fly. Remember that now, don't forget it!

Remember, if you eat, it gets turned into energy. That means you have to eat to get energy! ATTENTION EXERCISERS!

By the way, milk is good for calcium. SO DRINK MORE MILK KIDS! By the way, with all the swears I'm using, I guess you aren't reading this.

We process foods. Through our digestive system. It's fun to digest!

There is something that blocks your respiratory system, which stops food from going down it, that is dangerous, if that happened, chances are that YOU WILL DIE!

If you digest, then that means your body turns your food into the stuff! THE STUFF!
They will turn into the STUFF! STUFF! But that's another story. If you want to learn about pee and poop, you will have to wait for another week!

By the way, food isn't really romantic. Problem? HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Do you want to puke digestive system over your lunch? No? Then do not become a fly. Remember that now, don't forget it!

Remember, if you eat, it gets turned into energy. That means you have to eat to get energy! ATTENTION EXERCISERS!

By the way, milk is good for calcium. SO DRINK MORE MILK KIDS! By the way, with all the swears I'm using, I guess you aren't reading this.

By the way, your digestive system is pretty much one tube.

The insides of your stomach are acid-proof, so they can't be broken down. But the outside of your skin, well. If you eat your hand, it will digest.

Wolves hunt a lot. If you look at pictures on the internet enough, you might find wolves eating deer. That's just what they do, and they are made to digest meat and only meat. Nothing more, nothing less.

It's completely OK to eat meat, so I'd like to ask PETA to shut the flapjack up.

Euphemisms to the max!

By the way, wolves do not care about how many flies are around their meat, they have an iron gut, made for eating rotten meat. Nom Nom Nom. So wolves like their venison rare, I like my venison medium rare.

Wolves look kinda cute, but they are known to hunt and kill poor helpless animals.

By the way, it is NOT a good idea to make a nursery right next to a dingo pet shop. A dingo ate mah baby!

Bob! Where'd you put the meat sauce!

There is a lot of meat in your body, meat is muscle, muscle is meat. Muscle is needed to do stuff that require strength. If you do not have your muscles, you would be dead, because you would not be able to hold your weight. Remember that now, and remember that your digestive system contains muscle.

Your small intestine is longer than your large intestine, for those people who don't know already.

I dunno why the small intestine is called the small intestine. Oh yeah, its pretty tiny.

We must chew, it is important. Teeth are important, saliva is important. You need both to start digestion properly.

Your body is big, if you spread it out, it would be gigantic.

Some parts of your body, fully spread out, could be the size of a tennis court. Aren't you happy that it's all squeezed up, huh?

Chew, man, chew! It's important to your body!

The digestive system is hollow, well you need it to be hollow for the food to pass through, right?

Your digestive system is so gross, yet so important. So, when you go camping, you might go fishing or hunt some bunnies.                                 (we do that in new zealand, they're delicious.)
When that happens, you should observe their guts when gutting them, try guessing which organ it is, it's fun. I did it with fish. My gran deals with the rabbits.

Rabbits have no fat on their meat, which means you can't survive on rabbits. But you can survive on most meats. In fact, there is a specific name for that, rabbit poisoning. So be careful when you are camping, and if your pop says "Let's survive on rabbits!" tell him off. You need to eat some more things, like cow and chicken. You can survive on cow and chicken, they have fat. But that doesn't mean rabbits are bad! Eat as much as you like, but don't eat only that.

And this is the end of this post! I'm happy to teach you about the digestive system! And what to eat and what not to eat.

ERMAGHERD CHURRCURRLATUURY AHHND REESPHURRATORI SHURRSTEM!

Without oxygen, we die.

WE NEED LUNGS! SOME ANIMALS DON'T BUT WE DO!

Fish gills are weird.

LUNGFISH HAVE LUNGS AAAAAAAAAHHHH! CREEPY! WE WERE NOT THE FIRST TO HAVE LUNGS!

BY THE WAY, I AM TAKING MY TIME TO PRESS THE SHIFT KEY, WHICH MEANS THAT WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT IS PRETTY LEGIT!

Alveoli are weird, like a lot of bubbles grouped together!

Lungs work with the DIAPHRAGM! Once again, I took my time to press the shift key.

Blood is in your heart, it gets moved around!

We have a four chambered heart, which is just pretty much a huge lump of muscle!

The Diaphragm is really weird, it is pretty much the only moving muscle in the lung team.

Lungs do not move! The Diaphragm moves them. Between you and me, those lungs are real slackers, I bet that's why you die at the young age of 84.

Our life expectancy increased as we got more tech!

Oxygen is very important to us and our lives. Do not doubt that or you will die, I promise it.

Do you want to put yourself in an airless room? AIRLOCK! Do you know what happenes to your garbage in a rocket? It gets launched into space.

Fish gills are gross, they are hairy, bloody, creepy things.

By the way, I gutted a fish once. While it was alive. Poor thing. But it was pretty fun. JK. It was not fun at all.

Japanese like to eat fish, especially fish that are still alive. They are kept alive using electricity. And then their bits get cut off. And it watches you as you eat it's delicious raw body. Yeah, not cool. PETA! I have something that you should actually give a crap about!

By the way, animal cruelty is not cool, but if it is for your food, then be my guest.

I am not even talking about oxygen! I promise I will tank about it later.

We need to get rid of the Co2 in our body, Co2 is a gas called Carbon Dioxide, which you probably know already, but it is important to know that you do not need this gas, in fact, it's pretty bad to have it in your body.

Aberdeen. Sorry, I have no idea why I said that. ULAPOOL!

The Heart is not exactly the head honcho in the circulatory system. It is just important in it.

By the way, because I type instead of pressing one key at a time, when I press a lot of keys, I press the F and J key. Just saying.

Our circulatory and respiratory system is pretty important. Very important.

Our heart is very important, it pumps blood everywhere. PUMP PUMP PUMP PUMP!

If you cut open a vein, blood comes out.

If you tighten some skin around a part of your body, that part of your body will become blue.

There are lots of cool things about Circulatory and Respiratory systems. BUT BE CAREFUL. Listen about the things I say, it is dangerous if you DO NOT BREATHE.

If you stop breathing, you die. If you stop breathing against your will, then you are pretty much in some big crap there bro.

Moist with Mucus, another great band name, hank said that, OBEY.

Your body is very very VERY complicated, and your Circulatory and Respiratory system is one of the most complicated parts of it.

Your neurons are important. Wait, why am I talking about my last post? It's a mystery I'll solve later.

Fish breathe oxygen, like us, they just breathe it in a different way, they breathe it through the water, we breathe it through the air, so fish need bubbles in the water, so that's why you have those cool bubble machines next to your nice fish tank with all those cute goldfish.

Damn it, I just backspaced everything by accident. Gonna have to write this all over again. Isn't that hard work?! Well, I have to try my best. Go me!

Now, your heart is important, it is just one big damn piece of muscle, working 24/7. Isn't that hard work? What's that? You think that's unfair? Well the heart is willing to do this work. Actually, it's less 24/7, but more 24/7/4/365/84

The lungs do not work 24/7/4/365/84. They work 0/0/0/0/0 Poor Diaphragm is the one working 24/7/4/365/84. It's really unfair. But that's life, the lungs get to hang out while using the Diaphragm as a water bed. Your Diaphragm can get strained if you run after you drink water, I know how it feels, it feels TERRIBLE!

If you cut an artery, you are dead, not big surprise. By the way, If you get struck in the artery by an arrow or something, leave it there. Did you know that some arrows are not made to kill, they are made to slow down the person that they hit!
So, If you suddenly get stuck in a medieval battle and you get hit straight in the chest with an arrow, do not pull it out, just snap the end off, and then run to the nearest medieval medic.

Nerves Are Nervous.

The Nervous System is very complicated.

The Nervous System is pretty much mission control, everything that you do, that you are forced to do, and what you can't control is powered by the nervous system.

The nervous system runs down the spine. Try it on your friend. Put your finger on his spine and pull it down.

The spine runs down your whole body, which means you should have your nervous system on your spine, it's a very very very good idea! I mean GREAT IDEA.

The Nerves are very sensitive, which means if you touch and harass a nerve, it will create a weird feeling on you, or your victim.

H2O is important in your body, so the nerves say Give us water, you're torturing us.

The nervous system tells you lots of things, like GET YOUR HAND OFF THE DAMN STOVE YOU ****ING IDIOT!!!!!!

I should not have said that, but seriously, don't do that.

All this nervous system is really making me nervous.

The nervous system is very important to your survival, in fact, it's important in every animal except simple ones like sea sponges.

If the nerves detect that you are eating something yummy, then it will say you should eat some more of that stuff. You should eat more of it! Unless it is SCP-643. Don't even eat SCP-643. IT IS VERY DANGEROUS!

Touching stoves is dangerous, which means the body says DONT TOUCH THE ***ING STOVE!

The Typical Neuron has branches like a tree.

Voltage travels around neurons.

I don't actually know much about the nervous system and neurons, if you have any info, please TELL ME!

Don't touch fire, or else your body will activate your pain senses.

There are lots of signals coming into your body during biting, digestion, chewing, and tasting.

We need signals if we want to do stuff. We have lots of signals. I need signals to type.

The Nervous System is pretty much mission control, everything you do, everything you taste, everything you feel, everything that hurts, everything!

There are a lot of neurons in your brain, they are very important in your nervous system.

If your nervous system would get removed, you will stop moving, and you would stop breathing. In short, you would DIE. AND YOU WILL BE DEAD FOREVER.

Once again, your body will tell you not to touch a stove. Remember, don't touch a stove. It hurts you, but your body will say "GET YOUR HAND OF THE DAMN STOVE YOU ****ING IDIOT!" Therefore, it will HURT. A lot.

If you just need to RUUUN, then your body will start to try to RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!!!!

If you get a gurgly feeling in your stomach, you are probably scared, or maybe you're in a bad situation.

If you are in a bad situation, you will get a lot of energy pumped away from your stomach. Therefore, you get a gurgly feeling.

There are lots of nerves in our body.

Oh my god, did you hear about the shutdowns? Pirate Bay and Demonoid are down. Those darn Swedish government strike again. I swear that I will get my revenge.

By the way, more about nerves. "Sigh". Sorry, I just can't get over this. NO MORE TEAM EXTREME! No more minecraft! Please minecraft! Do not leave me! PLEASE! I don't wanna stick with minecraft 1.3.1! PLEASE MINECRAFT!

Anyway, I can speak more about this later. For now, let's talk about nerves. Ok.

Neurons are a type of cell that is in your brain, electricity runs through it a lot.

There is stuff in a neuron that has a really nice name. The Nodes Of Ranvier. Pronounced the Nodes Of Romviei.

The Eighth Harry Potter novel should be called Harry Potter and the Nodes Of Ranvier. I agree, Hank. I agree with you!

Do you want to eat stuff? LOL. You do not need to. WHAT DA WHAT DID I JUST SAY? You need to eat, therefore your body activates hunger. HUNGRY HUNGRY! FEED ME HUMAN. By the way, PIRATE BAY IS BACK! WOOHOO!

Anyway, the spinal cord makes a lot of decisions, the brain too, but the spinal cord controls all of your reflexes and everything you do, the brain just commands it.

Your brain will be disconnected if you cut off the brainstem, therefore you will DIE. If that's ok with you. I mean, if that's ok with you.

Do you not want to die. One way to do it is to NOT cut off your brainstem.

By the way, this is the last post of this blog!

LOL JK JK JK.

I bet all you people who love biology are reading this blog, well a message to you! I USE HUMOR!

By the way, the most abrupt thing in the world! THE END.

Animalz Behaviorz

Cats like treats, but they cant open treat bags because they don't have opposable thumbs.

Natural Selection caused us to have opposable thumbs, like our primate pals.

Hamsters in siberia are really weird. The female makes some kinda sound when she is ready, and then the male runs several miles to mate with her.

Some birds make houses, and when the females check them out, the males do a little dance. The Female may choose to mate with him or not.

Vampire Bats regurgitate blood for their babies.

Everyone loves food. We are stimulated to love food. That's why food is tasty. Food is tastier if it is healthier. Or if it seems healthier. Like Candy! Candy tricks the body to love the flavor of it, so humans eat it and get tubby.

Animal behavior is very weird. Animals like mating. That is it's behaviour, it is stimulated to mate.

Behavior is the action to a stimulus.

Animal Behavior is not only in animals, but us too! Because we are animals.

We can fight out animal behavior though! Which makes us a better evolved primate and in context, a human being.

Human Beings have the power to fight animal behavior.

Animal Behavior is limited to what an animal can do.

We fight stimulus to not do stupid things, like run around naked mating with things.

That is technically what animals do in the wild. But humans don't do that.

Humans used to do that, of course, but now it isn't good to do that. You should just marry once, and have a good wife and family.

Praying Manti(ses) have a stimulus to try to mate, and then try to lay an egg. And then they have no stimulus to do anything at all! They just wait to die. And then they die. I observed this. I found a praying mantis. And the next day it died. I was quite disappointed, until I found out it left behind a very great present! A egg sac! Later, it hatched. And we let the babies go to challenge the wild.

Kneading is very common in cats. Knead Knead Knead.

Kneading is the stimulus of wanting milk, that stays while your cat grows up.

Cats purr when they hate something that is happening, or when something they like is happening. They also purr when they are in labor.

Cats meow quietly, and then loudly, and then quietly.

Lorenz was revolutionary, although he was trapped in Nazi Land.

Nazi Party leaders had some crazy ideas from Lorenz's discoveries, because Nazis are crazy.

Snapping turtles just wait. UNTIL THEY FIND A FISH AND THEN THEY CHOMP THEIR HEAD OFF! BLOOD AND GORE GETS EVERYWHERE! THE FISHIE'S HEAD JUST FLOATS AROUND IN THE STOMACH OF THE SNAPPING TURTLE UNTIL IT DISSOLVES, AND THEN IT EATS THE BACK END! OH MY GAWSH!

The Bower Bird makes a nest, and then he collects stuff.

The Bower Bird dances after a female bird gets near. It's more of a mating ritual.

If the ritual works, they just rub butts and run off! The female just lays the eggs, incubates them and then finally, finally, after all that work. THE BABIES HATCH.

Behaviors can come with advantages, including trying to reproduce and selflessness, in the case of lemmings.

Gazelles can't reach the same leaves that the Giraffe can, therefore, it's behavior is limited to it's size.

Ethologists are people who study animal behavior.

Duck behavior is when it hatches, it's mom is specified as the first thing moving away from the nest.

Austrians worked with Tinbergen.

If you taint a pureblooded animal's blood, I mean if it reproduces with a different kind of it's species, it will not be pureblooded anymore.

Alligator Snapping Turtles have a tongue that looks like a fish.

Females of bird species usually choose what bird they will reproduce with by the thing it does best. The bird that does it better gets to have kids.

Larger communities of animals make then feed each other, the bigger the community, the more animals feed each other.

Cats don't regurgitate blood into other Cat's mouths.

Animals are successful, if they have the right behaviors. Animals must like food, they must have a behavior of eating. And they must like mating, they have a behavior of mating.

Some cats do have thumbs, but no cats have opposable thumbs.

A Cat's digestive system is made to eat meat, and normally cannot handle too many veggies. But sometimes they eat veggies to throw up.

Bower Birds mainly collect garbage with a blue tint, this attracts the female Bower bird. After it is attracted, the male starts it's ritual, and if the female accepts, they will mate. And the female will lay eggs, and incubate them, and then the chicks will hatch! And then the cycle starts again, the male birds must do their best to make a Bower hut.

Lorenz shared the nobel prize with 2 austrian scientists.

Geese have no impression of who their mother is, they just choose the first thing that moves.

Chordates

Lampreys suck blood, but they aren't very complex, they don't have jaws, but they have a spinal cord.

Fish used to have face armor.

Coelacanths are very old animals.

Lungfish can walk on land, if they want to get to another ocean or lake. They have LUNGS. And GILLS.

We are Mammalian amniotic tetropodal sarcopterygiian osteichythyan gnathostomal vertebrate cranial chordates. "Takes breath of air"

We are very very very very very very very very very VERY complex.

We are more complex than insects, which makes us COMPLEX.

Vertebrae are more complex than non-vertebrates.

Dogs are like us, very complex and they are mammals, with hair, hearts, and brains.

We all started from one little cell, and then we evolved. Even when we're created, we are cells, racing for the chance to have a life. Once the sperm reaches the egg, all access to the egg is blocked off from other sperm (UNLESS TWINS) and then they get eaten by the crazed white blood cells, who love sperm (TO EAT).

The Lancelets are weird because of the cords coming out of their mouth.

The Coccyx is a great place, it is the place I'm referring to in this next sentence.

And this is where I'd put my tail! IF I HAD ONE!

Brains are pretty much restricted to some animals, fishies have brains, buggies don't

Our spinal cord is used when we move around, it has lots of nerves that detect what the brain wants the body to do.

We are very weird for a 2 legged animal, because we don't have tails.

Apes are mostly on all 4's/\.

Coelacnaths were caught by a guy who decided to show some scientists.

Birds have a gizzard, which is filled with ROCKS. That's right, birds eat rocks.

Do you have a gizzard? No. We have TEETH.

Do you want some rooster teeth? Well you can't have them. You can have rooster gizzards though? Want some?! THEY ARE DELICIOUS.

Vertebrates have a backbone that supports their structure.

Vertebrates usually have other bones, especially complex ones.

We don't have slits that let us breathe, instead we have lungs, which also let us breathe.

Post Anal tails are the best way to go.

Sea Squirts have weird tadpoles, which means they get included in chordates.

Sharks skeletons are completely made out of cartilage.

Lobe Finned Fishes are fishies that have muscle in their fins.

Tetrapods are animals with 4 feet.

The first Tetrapods were amphibians.

The Embryo is put inside the womb for animals.

The Coccyx is really weird, try touching it. Or try not to.

Your Coccyx is really creepy, that is where your tail should be, or where your tail is! In the dog's case.

Some fish are creepy. FISHIES. Fish like the Coelacanths.

Deep sea fish have big eyes, big mouths, big (insert body part here). Thats right mate.

We have a very complex name, as I stated earlier. Nope not gonna say it again.

The Lancelets have cords coming out of their mouths, but they are named head cords.

We have discs of cartilage between our spine.

Pharyngeal Slits are those things you see on sharks that makes them scary, you know, those red slits beside it's head.

We are part of chordata, all vertebrates are. but we are not the only ones in chordata, there are lots more things in this "sorry no idea"

The Myxni is really weird. It is classified as a vertebrate, but it does not have a spine. The reason it is called a vertebrate is because it has a skull. Weird huh? I don't get it either. NOBODY GETS EET!

The Coelacanth is very rare, don't even try to find it. But if you do, tell me in the comments, you are one of those lucky divers.

The Phylum Chordata contains about 50,000 vertebrates and a few thousand invertebrates.

Cartilage is very important in our bodies, because it helps us bend and stuff.

There are lots of different vertebrates.

I have the answer to life, the universe and everything! TORNADO OF CREATION!

Sharks have chambered hearts.

Rays are similar to Sharks.

Bony fish are not very rare at all.

The Coelacanths should walk on land, but they don't.

Coelacanths are not good eaten. For a good reason dude.

Amphibia were the first animals to evolve a 3 chambered heart.

The Archosaurs died out with the dinosaurs, but some of them survived.

Birds have a 4- chambered heart.

We also have a 4-chambered heart. If i'm right.

Mammals have milk! Some mammals sweat milk! Other animals have breasts which dispense milk. Like us. I mean ladies. Not like me. Like all ladies reading this. Not like all men reading this. SEA SQUIRTS ARE SIMILAR TO US LOL!

Complex Animals. AGAIN IF YOU DON'T THINK RELIGION IS TRUE GET OFF THIS BLOG.

We are far more complex than insects, but complexity started with insects, with their multiple segments.

The Folds in our brains are segments, our spine is splitted into segments, our fingers are splitted into segments, they're crazy evolved segments, but segments just the same.

Crustaceans are also complex, they are very tasty complex animals, but complex just the same.

Segments, segments, segments. We all have segments, but it all started with insects.

Some old insects had a 2 foot wingspan. That wingspan is probably bigger than the width of the screen you are viewing.

Centipedes have poisoned claws to paralyze their prey, but Millipedes don't. So be careful which "pede" you touch.

The reason those 2 foot insects died out? Lack of oxygen. That's right, oxygen is lower than it used to be.

By the way, a reminder. Living Things evolve. If you don't think so, just stop reading my blog and go worship your spaghetti monster.

I, by the way, am not an atheist. I do have a religion. BUT. I do know that ANIMALS EVOLVE. There is so much proof. Which doesn't include our little animated videos.

By the way, this is (not) a good speech.

“I’ve been thinking. When life gives you lemons? Don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give me lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s going to burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m going to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

Comparative Anatomy

We get our energy from eating other life forms.

Plants get their energy from the sun, which is how they make their food.

Sharks can and will die if they stop moving.

How do they sleep you say? They move while sleeping.

Birds evolved from small dinosaurs.

Sir Andrew Huxley won a nobel prize.

Nerve tissue manages electrical connections in the body.

We are more related to other animals than we are to plants.

We are more related to mammals than we are to other animals.

We are more related to primates than other mammals.

We are more related to other humans than we are to primates.

Thomas Henry Huxley discovered that Birds evolved from small dinosaurs, and he also invented the word agnostic.

Huxley made friends with darwin.

Animals can move so they can, umm, yeah, umm. . . .. .. . . . . . . . .

Yeah, umm, you know. Right? Oh god I don't want to explain it, if you don't know just stop reading now please.

Comparative Anatomy studies the difference and similarities of living organisms.

We are not green and we cannot make our own food. So we are not related to a plant.

An animal is a living thing that propels itself with limbs, that can usually not make their own food, if not altogether.

Not all animals have bones, some just have an exoskeleton.

Some aquatic animals just shoot their sperm into the water and cross their fingers that another fish gets pregnant.

Sharks reproduce like mammals, you know, something goes somewhere....

Sharks still lay eggs.

Sharks are the only fish that have a sex organ similar to a mammal's

Huxley found out about lots of things. He was a ship surgeon before he became a great scientist. Also, everyone in england envied his great big sideburns.

Huxley was nicknamed darwin's bulldog, because he vowed to kill whoever didn't believe in darwin's ways.

Huxley's thing about birds and dinosaurs was not believed for about 100 years.

Comparative Anatomy, it gets us to know that we are different, but we are also similar to other animals! Those animals include birds, mammals and even fish! But not insects.

Nerve tissue contains neurons, which are a brainy thing, you should know.

Every animal and plant gets sick. Plants get growths and stuff on them, while animals get sick.

Plant Animals eating meat is a pretty bad thing. But dogs eating grass isn't bad though.

Would you like to throw up? Here are a list of things that can make you throw up, may it be grossness, sickness, or just a stomachache. Corpses, rotten stuff, raw meat, flies or maybe even excrements! If you eat like that. Anyone for a feces patty with a side of concentrated urine? Oh, time for the main course! A 7 day old head of a human with a topping of raw dead flies? Dessert! A cup of month old ice cream!

Lol, that was a great laugh.

Birds can walk like us, but they can fly much better. And actually, they jump more than walk.

Fish, Birds and Mammals can move around in the water, all fish can, for the bird family, penguins are the best, for mammals, the best are all swimming mammals, including seals, whales, dolphins, orcas, that kind of deal.

Most animals have a digestive system.

Our hands are actually very related to bat hands. Now instead of jazz hands..... I give you! Baat hands!

The sea sponge does not move, but it is an animal! Do not doubt anything! By the way, it would be really rare to get a kitchen sponge that was actually made out of a sponge.

Huxley connected paleontology and biology together, we have a lot to thank him for.

The Huxley family seems to be blessed with good minds! One of huxley's descendants got a Nobel Prize.

By the way, the nobel prize is a prize given by alfred nobel, who was one of the richest people in the world, because he invented...................
TriNitroToluene! AKA TNT.

Sharks have to be careful about moving, because if they stop, everything stops.

Penguins don't have wings, they have flippers, like seals and orcas.

Orcas are called killer whales for a reason. Did you hear about this. "Come here Mr Orca, we are going to feed you fish to do a.." NOM. "Epic bleeding lower torso" Shoot the thing! BANG BANG. FREEDOM! Splat. It killed itself and most of the Army Rangers.

By the way, that story is slightly fabricated.

Birds push air so they can stay floating, they usually fly.

Animals have a close common ancestor.

Orcas have a reputation to drag their trainers under water and half drown them.

Orcas also headbutt their trainers sometimes.

The least it might do is buck you off and chase you out of the tank.

So, let that be a lesson to all you retired orca trainers, DON'T RISK TRAINING ORCAS. PERIOD.

Ok, this is the final post for a long time! Bye! Bye!

Evalushuun

People say that evolution is all random.

Do you believe in evolution? Yes you do. You should. 'Cause if you don't, that means that you don't believe in biology, which means you shouldn't be reading this blog right now.

Dorudons were similar to whales.

Every vertebrate looks exactly the same in the first stage of their embryo evolution.

All living things on earth use DNA or RNA to encode information about what they are.

The start of vertebreal life starts from 3.8 billion years ago.

People used to think dinosaurs were gigantic iguanas.

Rodhocetus was a cool animal, because it lived under water, but it had arms and legs.

The Morganucuddon looked like some kind of rat.

Are molecules are the same thing as like everything.

Australia is famous for it's marsupials.

New zealand is famous for it's sheep, but secretly more famous for being the place where rabbits are actually pests that you can shoot. I am New Zealander, so I liek shooting rabbits.

The Theory Of Evolution is a pretty good thing, and I am pretty sure it is true, but it was not always thought to be true. In the old times, they used other ways to explain things.

Fossils taught us that whales used to walk.

Whales descended from land animals! Woo!

Bisons are related to Whales. Don't believe me? See for yourself.

Our forelimbs are for grabbing things.

Natural Selection is part of evolution.

So is sexual selection.

Mutations are also important.

A lot of our awesome things are based on mutations, probably.

Try looking for mutations in our evolution. I'm sure you'll find some.

If animals are a different color from it's normal color, it won't be stronger. It's not a shiny.

Very few marsupials live in america, but australia is the home of marsupials, there are marsupials everywhere. EVERYWHERE. Koalas, Kangaroos, possums, OH MY GOSH SO CUTE SO CUUUUTE!

Evolution is very hard to discuss, it's a thing, not a debate.

Evolution makes things different different from each other, which is why human's don't have stink glands like the skunk.

This is taxonomy, but for those who are interested in where humans come from, here we go! Kingdom:Animalia Phylum:Chordata Class:Mammalia Order:Primates Family:Hominidae Tribe:Hominini Genus:Homo Species:Sapiens.

The earliest known primate looked like a squirrel, it is called the Plesiadapis.

Opossums are one of the not so many marsupials in america.

Our world is beautiful, and I think everybody would agree with that.

We evolved to create clothes not for covering your private areas, but to keep warm!
It's cold without a bunch of hair! And when cavemen choose from walking in the nude from warm testicles, they choose warm testicles.

We dissect things, that isn't wrong. We need to know about animals anyway. Vivisection is wrong. I think so. Well, actually, Vivisection with painkillers (not the drug) is ok.

Evolution is responsible for the awesome, great, but weird difference all animals have.

People say that evolution was just random, but they are wrong 99.9999999999999999..........% of the time.

Bats have very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very long fingers. Don't you think. Or maybe you don't think so. Because they have wings. DARNINT BAT WINGS ARE HANDS DARNIT.

Life is worth studying and knowing more about.

Can we all agree that life is beautiful please?

If we track down our ancestors, we can find out which animals we are related to.

Our structures are the same and our molecules are the same as other vertebreal animals.

Those animals in madagascar, I forgot their name, they were conquered by monkeys in all other parts of the world, and they are now extinct. Can you tell me their name?

DNA, genetics, natural selection, sexual selection, respiration, taxonomy, they are all related to evolution.

In america, only 40% of the population believes in evolution. Let's change that. The percentage of people that believe in evolution must be OVER 90000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!1!111!!ONE!

Bats, humans, monkeys, whales, and LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS of other animals. I lost it there.

Evolution is amazing. I think it's really something to celebrate about. I'M HITTING THE CAPS LOCK KEY! I SAVED THIS FOR A SPECIAL OCCASION, BECAUSE I NORMALLY JUST HIT THE SHIFT KEY! OH WATS DAT DIRECTOR? damn they just took my caps lock key. didn't steal my exclamation mark key tho!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
oh hellz yeah they just took that too. anyway, do you think evolution is true? show me in the comments [exclamation mark] although you never do. anyway, bye and get ready for the next post [exclamation mark]

Taxonomy

We all have a common ancestor, something we are all descended from.

That organism lived a very long time ago.

We all have a similar ancestor.

Which means we may be about 999999999th cousins or something.

Archaea are much more hardy than Bacteria, which are both related to Eukarya.

Protista, Fungi, Plants and Humans are related to Eukarya.

Fungi are Hederotrophs, like animals.

All animals, including us are made out of lots of cells, including us.

Cats, Dogs and Skeevers are Carnivorous.

Cats are also called Felis Catus.

If you can spot the easter egg here, you are pretty good at finding stuff.

By the way, skeevers eat rabbits and other small animals.

Birds are closely related to Reptiles, but they were thought to be related to butterflies, because they could both fly.

We are related to primates, and we might be thought to be related to primates, because we both walk on 2 legs.

Taxonomy was founded by Carl Lineaus.

Carl Lineaus was kinda weird, because he wanted his students to collect specimens for his studies.

Lineaus didn't have much idea about where life came from.

The 3 domains are bacteria, eukarya, and Archaea.

Bacteria and Eukarya used to be just one domain called Monera.

There are lots of animals, and we are descended from eukarya.

Animalia is every animal in existence.

Monera are tiny things.

100 percent of adorable organisms are in Animalia.

We are more closely related to mice than we are to fish, and we are more related to fish than fruit flies.

Mammalia mostly have a tail and a backbone.

Felidae is the family of cats, which includes tigers, lions, cougars, werecats, leopards, cheetas, sabre toothed tigers, sabre cats, cat people, cats of course, ocelots, ligers, tigrons and finally, what you have all been waiting for, please wait for a few more words............ the Toyger.

Every living thing on this planet is related to every other living thing on this planet.

The organism that we all (Yes. Even plants) descended from lived a long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long looooooooooong time ago.

New species get discovered all the time.

What's that? Do you smell some humor coming up?

The dog species is called the canines, similar to felines. Things in the canine family are: Wolves, dogs, Barbas, Meeko, Vigilance, Werewolves, Jake, Jacob the Werewolf, Smiledog.jpg, Cerberus, Blind Dogs, Pseudodogs, and finally, what you have all been waiting for, just wait for a few more words, The Familiar.

Rodents include: Rats, Beavers, Skeevers, Naked Mole Rats, Wererats, Buck-Toothed Platypus Rats, and finally, what you have been waiting for, you don't even care do you, The Capybara.

We are all part of eukarya, the place where every part of life starts.

Darwin Never Met Mendel.

Darwin had no idea how traits were passed on to a father or mother's descendants.

Darwin and Mendel had no idea that their ideas connected together, and they never did.

Mendel had an idea how traits were passed on to a father or mother's descendants.

We have something important that we do.... NOT RANDOMLY MATING.

Dogs mate randomly though. Maters Gonna Mate.

Most animals mate randomly, but some animals have 1 mate for life.

Dry earwax genes are recessive, so there is more chance that you will have wet earwax.

9% of people have dry earwax.

We still have some kind of urge to randomly mate, because we used to.

Darwin and Mendel worked at exactly the same time.

Mendel studied how animal genes were passed on to their offspring, and darwin studied how natural selection worked, those two things connected together and now we know how people and animals evolve. Not a long story.

Mendel found out about alleles.

Earwax is a great example of how traits are passed down from parents, as you have a better chance of having wet earwax than having dry earwax.

If you have half wet earwax and half dry earwax in your genetics, you will have wet earwax because there is a better chance of having wet earwax.

If you have completely dry earwax, you will have dry earwax.

Darwin didn't understand mutation, where a mistake happens in meiosis.

The mutant may be better or worse at a certain thing it does.

Genetic Drift's effects are best seen in small populations.

Hardy and Weinberg came up with the exact same thing, and they didn't even know each other.

The Hardy Weinberg equilibrium requires no natural selection, no sexual selection, no mutations, a giant population side and no gene flow.

The Hardy Weinberg equilibrium is no fun at all.

Both parents contribute a version of their genes called an allele to their child.

That is what Mendel found out.

Population Genetics involve both Darwin and Mendel's ideas.

Darwin defended his ideas from haters.

Non random Mating is encouraged in all readers of my blog. Do not randomly mate.

Sexual Selection are alleles for more sexy creatures.

The Hardy-Weinberg Equilibrium says no to lots of selections, and it doesn't allow gene flow.

Hardy and Weinberg, like Mendel and Darwin, never knew each other. Ever.

Earwax is a great example of recessive and dominant alleles, because wet earwax is dominant and dry earwax is recessive.

If the Hardy-Weinberg Equilibrium is used in a population, 9% of that population will have dry earwax, and 91% will have wet earwax.

A lot of people have wet earwax, including me, and 91% of the time you.

However, if you are that 9% that doesn't, I cannot even say how lucky you are. I want your earwax.

We know a whole lot about heredity.

Sexual Selection is when a more good looking guy gets all the girls.

The smaller the population, the more chance there will be genetic drift.

Hardy and Weinberg made the Hardy-Weinberg equation, which teaches a lot about genetics and stuff.

Non random mating goes out of the window when lust gets involved. LOL.

Firstly, before you marry, it's actually lust that drives you to your girlfriend. Everyone does it. That means everyone is committing a sin! Noooooooooo.... Nah jk. LOL.

Some mutations can result in the death or deformation of the offspring, but sometimes it makes the person better at stuff.

Hardy and Weinberg found out about the same thing at 1908.

There are only 2 alleles for earwax.

I dunno if the Hardy Weinberg Equilibrium is even possible in real life, because natural selection must happen, and sexual selection happens a lot with animals.

Mendel's information would be pretty interesting to darwin.

There are several factors that change the allele frequency in the population.

We have lots of alleles, which we will pass onto our descendants, Or already have.

If you bring over your hot cousin from the next island over, that would mess up the hardy-weinberg equilibrium.

Population genetics are not a complicated idea.

Sexual alleles are for sexy pplz.

Lol.

Hardy and Weinberg didn't do anything amazing that made this happen, they just searched for stuff, and then it happened, Hardy Weinberg Equilibrium! LOL!

I know Allele is spelled allele instead of allelle because the word correction tells me that.

Natural Selection makes the alleles that make you survive more frequent.

Gene Flow is when a population mixes with another population.

Gene Flow will mess with the allele frequencies in the hardy-Weinberg equilibrium, which is why it was banned in it.

The End The End OHMIGOD CREEEEEEEEEEEEPER!!!!!!!!!!11!!!1!!111!!

Evolutionary Development!!!11!!!

We are 85% genetically identical to mice.

Boys usually try to become scientists because they want to blow stuff up, or get bitten by a super radioactive monkey so they become a super radioactive battle monkey, but in fact, scientists are very careful in their experiments.

Butt eyeballs are a real thing, because of some terrible swiss scientists. I mean eyeballs on the butt, not butts on the eyeballs.

Birds lost their teeth as they evolved from raptors, which took a looooooooooong time.

Birds still have genes for teeth.

Mutant chicken embryos had TEETH.

There are weird mutant animals that you can make if you switch on the genes that weren't used by the guys.

Chickens can have fangs. So rooster teeth actually makes cents now! Rooster Teeth thought about everyting!

If we switch a gene, we might grow hair everywhere. I think. Whatever.

Genes are cool, because of the cool things we can do if we switch genes on and off.


It isn't fun to blow stuff up. There may be a bloodstain on the ceiling to symbolise the memorable moment when your intestines got blown all across the ceiling.

Or maybe if you become a radioactive battle human, there may be that blood stain on the wall that symbolises that memorable moment when you turned your colleague into minced homo sapien sapien.

More on evolutionary development. Us mixing genes has just been started lately, the event with the fly with eyeballs on it's butt occured in 1997.

We have lots of genes, and one of them is not having a thumb in the middle of your forehead or (oh god why) a butt on your forehead.

If we go deep into our genes, we even might be able to edit our babies to have 4 eyes, but I think you wouldn't consider doing that. If you are considering that, you are so cruel.

The event where chicks had teeth shows that birds still have some reptile genes in them. You could maybe make a chicken into a reptile! But I doubt it.

Genes are given instructions, and then they do what they're said to do.

Birds lost teeth about 60,000 years ago, just to pop back up again with the mutant chicks with teeth incident.

Hox genes kick in after the embryo is more developed, and it gives instructions on where to put the body parts.

Most regulatory genes are inherited.

There only put regulatory genes in the butt of the eyeball butt fly, so they only evolved fly eyeballs.

Hox stands for Homeobox. I think.

We are all built using the same blueprint.

Evolution is not mutations, it's just genes being switched on and off.

All animals are way more similar than we think they are.

We are extremely similar to a chimp, but not exactly the same.

If you are a scientist that is an ace in evolutionary development, you might be able to make a fly with eyeballs on it's butt, or a chicken with teeth. BUT NO BATTLE MONKEYS.

Hox genes only activate genes. Other genes make the body parts.

Gene Products are already sitting in the egg before it's fertilized.

Our Hox gene instructions are similar to lots of other Hox gene instructions for other mammals.

Birds are similar to velicoraptors, but as you may have seen, birds don't have teeth, do they? No they don't. So they still have the teeth gene.

If you find a blind animal embryo, and switch on the gene that gives it eyes, it might get eyes. Best done with the blind cave fish.

No genes are activated until they are told when to activate it.

Our genetic makeup is very similar to our mammal counterparts, including dogs, cats, mice, etc.

All animals are way more similar than we think they are.

If a chimp is wearing a fedora, you might briefly think it is a human, or not even notice it at all.

The short answer of how we are similar to a mouse is Developmental Regulatory Genes.

All vertebrates have similar genes, like that we have a backbone, mouths, stuff like that.

Hox genes make a huge effect on how the animal will look.

It may be possible to turn a reptile into some kind of bird, but that might not be possible because the bird stage of evolution was after the reptile stage.

Evolution takes place over a long time.

These genes being switched on and off explains how animals evolve, because animals had too little time to evolve like they should have.

Mammals have more relations to each other than vertebrates, but we still are pretty similar.

Animal Development

We were just tubes, like worms, but then we evolved into humans through million of years.

There are 8 parts of animal species difference, the species, the genus, the family, the order, the class, the phylum, the kingdom and the domain.

Sea Sponges have a very simple body system, and if you, well, blenderise a sea sponge and leave it's blenderised body for a day, the sea sponge bits will form into a new sponge.

Sponges don't have a mouth or an anus.

Some animals have 1 hole that acts as a mouth and a anus.

Aren't you glad that you're a little more complicated than that.

We are actually still just tubes, at least what's inside us.

Our Intestines, veins, etc, are just tubes, as I said earlier.

The formation of the digestive tract is the first stage of becoming a sentient being that's alive, you know what I mean.

We have a complex digestive tract, and again, be thankful that you have a mouth and a anus.

We have lots of germ layers, like other complex mammals.

Other animals, like shellfish have their mouth and anus on their same tube, which is kinda gross, but the shellfish doesn't care, that's just how it's built.

We all used to be shellfish so we also excreted poop through are mouths. Gross.

Sponges are kinda like octopuses, as they both have brains all around them, but I think that only the sponges can reform together.

Sea Sponges don't have mouths.

Sea Sponges don't have anuses either.

Sea Sponges have a Monus! Lol, It's kinda like a mouth and a anus, umm, yeah, ok.

We have an Ectoderm and an Endoderm, the ectoderm being the skin and the endoderm being the intestines, inside parts, stuff, etc.

Embryos evolve all the body parts that a normal animal would have through all the months or years that the baby is inside the womb.

Were all just tubes! Were all just tubes! TUBES! Don't you understand man! TUBES!

A sea sponge is a mess symmetry wise.

The sea sponge can survive no matter how many pieces it is in, just try doing that with another animal, actually, wait, NO, DON'T TRY DOING THAT WITH ANOTHER ANIMAL.

The Morula is named after a mulberry because it looks like one.

We are built around tubes.

Gastrulation is where developing stops for the Monus creatures.

Darwin edited pictures to correspond with his theory instead of editing his theory to correspond with the pictures.

Animals at the phylum level have lots of differences.

Sea sponges are not so amazing multi-cellular organisms.

We, as animals have a digestive tract with a mouth at one end and an anus at the other.

Embryos don't look like the animal that they're meant to look like first, but through the time in the womb they become more and more like the animal that they're meant to look like.

Hippies and PETA are not the only people that care about nature, ecologists do too.

If a sperm cell and an egg cell connect, they will develop into a variety of animals, depending on which type of sperm and egg they have.

Sea anemones, jellyfish and corals only have a Monus.

All vertebrates are Deuterostomes, which means that all of us vertebrates were just a puny butthole attached to something.

We don't stop at Diploblasts, we keep evolving until we're Triploblasts.

All vertebrate embryos look pretty similar, at least in the eyes of Heckell.

Heckell observed embryos for a long time, which must be pretty horrifying, unless the embryo is still in the womb.

Heckell was editing his drawings to match his theory, which was pretty bad, because you should instead make the theory match your drawings.

The endoderm of our germ layers makes up our digestive tract, our esophagus, you know what I mean.

It's unbelievably amazing that we evolve from a one celled organism to a human being.

Sea Sponges do not have any organs, or brains, or, well, you know, they are pretty much nothing.

Embryos get their food from a tube called an umbilical cord.

Some of the food a pregnant woman eats will get transferred to the embryo through the umbilical cord.

But for eggs, the food is transferred from the yolk, where the delicious raw yolk (eww) gets eaten by the chick while still in the egg.

Not only chicks but also reptiles, amphibians and fish also use the egg tactic, only us mammals only use the umbilical cord-Painful birth-Mother in terrible pain tactic.

Basically, god's been a scumbag creating us mammals. He only gave echidnas and Platypuses the awesome egg laying ability.

And we have to go through a painful birth. Well only the women. Poor women.

Speciation!

Lions and Tigers can have babies, aka Ligers and Tigrons.

If a male lion and a female tiger have a cub, it will become a Liger.

If a male tiger and a female lion have a cub, it will become a Tigron.

Mules are made when a male donkey and a female horse have a baby.

All of the three animals that I've described earlier cannot have babies themselves.

I can't be sure about this, but I think that there are lots of other crossbreeded animals out there.

Some dog breeds can breed with each other, some cannot.

We are related to chimps and bonobos, but I don't think that means you should try to mate with them, if you know what I mean.

Two organisms have to have fertile offspring if they want their offspring to have offspring.

Lions and tigers cannot create fertile offspring.

Donkeys and Horses cannot have fertile offspring either.

We are slightly related to our ancestors, homo erectus and homo habilis.

You can imagine a liger as a tiger with lion skin and a tigron as a lion with tiger skin.

If your species branches out too far, you will not be able to make fertile offspring with the other branch.

An example of one species being separated is when a branch of a bird species becomes nocturnal, making it a completely different branch and eventually a different species.

Ground Finches and Cactus Finches can have babies, which was bigger than the other ones.

Dog Breeding takes the natural out of the selection.

We are the now dominant homo, and we made all the others go extinct.

We are Homo Sapien Sapiens.

Lions and Tigers are different species, but they are from the same family, the feline family.

Humans and Monkeys are different species, but they are from the same family, the primate family.

All of our other ancestors kicked the bucket long ago.

We lack significant body hair because, maybe we were originally designed for the sea, with hair that is good for swimming. This is only a theory, because we are made to eat seafood. There are more theories, but in my opinion, this is the most logical.

Don't completely believe what I said earlier, our natural food might not be seafood, this is just another theory. The reason of this theory being made is because fish oil makes our brain better and it seems that people who eat fish live longer.

There are lots of theories about human evolution, but I think the seafood one is the most logical. This is just my opinion, you can choose your own.

The next sentence is another example of speciation.

The Homo Sapiens (not us) split into two species, Homo Sapiens Sapiens(us) and Homo Sapeins Neanderthalensis.

Almost all past animals speciated to become two different species, like birds and reptiles. Ever heard of the Archaeopteryx? The Archaeopteryx is a reptile that slowly morphed into a bird. The bird species is just the product of speciation! Dinosaurs speciated to become birds and maybe even mammals!

The fish speciated to become amphibians, which speciated to become reptiles, which speciated to become birds and animals.

There is a lot of speciation in animal evolution.

I'm kinda exaggerating here, because speciation did not cause everything. This is just one of my theories.

You cannot reproduce with other mammals other than even only a small amount of apes, but I think you should stick with humans, dude. Because the reproduction stage for a human and another hairy ape is like "Oh........ God."

Stick to your own species please.

Humans may be far apart, but we are still not too far apart to not be able to reproduce with each other, humans can still reproduce with humans.

In the future, I think we will still be able to reproduce with each other, but if we split too far, we won't be able to reproduce with each other, although this happening is very unlikely.

If one branch of a species lived in a snowy environment and another branch lived in a very tropical environment, they might be able to split into two new species, but this hasn't happened yet with humans, if it ever will.

You cannot reproduce with other mammals other than even only a small amount of apes, but I think you should stick with humans, dude. Because the reproduction stage for a human and another hairy ape is like "Oh........ God."

Stick to your own species please.

Humans may be far apart, but we are still not too far apart to not be able to reproduce with each other, humans can still reproduce with humans.

In the future, I think we will still be able to reproduce with each other, but if we split too far, we won't be able to reproduce with each other, although this happening is very unlikely.

If one branch of a species lived in a snowy environment and another branch lived in a very tropical environment, they might be able to split into two new species, but this hasn't happened yet with humans, if it ever will.



You cannot reproduce with other mammals other than even only a small amount of apes, but I think you should stick with humans, dude. Because the reproduction stage for a human and another hairy ape is like "Oh........ God."

Stick to your own species please.

Humans may be far apart, but we are still not too far apart to not be able to reproduce with each other, humans can still reproduce with humans.In the future, I think we will still be able to reproduce with each other, but if we split too far, we won't be able to reproduce with each other, although this happening is very unlikely.

If one branch of a species lived in a snowy environment and another branch lived in a very tropical environment, they might be able to split into two new species, but this hasn't happened yet with humans, if it ever will.

Natural Selection!

Natural Selection occurs when the animals that are more suitable to the environment survive, and the ones that are not don't.

The animals that survive, of course, reproduce, making the species more adapted to the current environment.

Charles Darwin discovered Natural Selection, when he found out that Galapagos Finches on different islands had different beaks, showing that the species of Finches that was more suitable for that Island survived, and the ones that weren't didn't.

The Finches also increased fitness until it was suitable for the island they were on.

Through Natural Selection we got to where we were today.

If an animal gives birth, usually there is a runt of the litter, which normally does not survive because the other young push it out of the way, leaving it to die.

The sentence above is another example of natural selection.

Darwin married his cousin, which made him think about natural selection and if his offspring would be healthy.

Darwin studied crossbreeding and inbreeding.

Darwin had 10 children. 3 of them died in their childhood and the other 7 were not very healthy, which made him think even more about natural selection and inbreeding.

Giraffes adapted to have medium length necks, with the ones with very long necks dying and the ones with very short necks dying.

Medium is best for Natural Selection, but now the big kids also survive because of a Ceasarian Section, where an operation is made to get the large baby out through a cut in the womb, which they pull the big baby out of.

Birds had a hard time seeing common pepper moths until the trees turned black because of the soot, after that, the rarer, black moths survived.

Charles Darwin, maybe one of the most famous scientists, went to the galapagos islands, and you know the rest, I made notes on it.

Charles Darwin was interested in natural selection for his whole life.

The Galapagos Finches were one of the most important things in science.

Emma Wedgewood was the wife of Charles Darwin, and, actually was his first cousin.

Darwin also studied plant crossbreeding.

The survival rate of babies was better for the middle range babies.

There are lots of examples of natural selection.

The animals need to adapt to the environment, food, water, pretty much any essential thing if they want to survive.

Some animals use sexual selection, like deer and peacocks.

Sexual selection is when the stronger male, in this case, the one with the bigger horns and the bigger plumage, gets all the girls.

Natural Selection is one of the most important types of evolutionary change in history.

Populations can have way more offspring if there is an abundance of food, but when that food runs out, most of the young will die, the survivors being the winners of natural selection.

Normally, the survivors of natural selection should have all of the offspring, making all of the babies like them, so they will survive better than the ones who died.

There are lots of causes of natural selection, including a parasite, change in the weather, change in food and lots of other things.

Charles Darwin was obsessed with observing nature.

Charles Darwin went to the galapagos islands on a ship called the Beagle.

There was someone in the Beagle that didn't want to believe charles darwin, he was a very serious christian.

Darwin's family was not as healthy as the average family in the present.

The Coal Powered Factories is the reason that the white peppered moths almost went extinct.

Only 5 percent of the peppered moths were white after a bit of soot covered trees.

Charles Darwin also studied his own family. Awkward, huh?

The Finches that ate hard seeds had thick beaks, the ones that ate insects had skinny, pointed beaks, and finally, the ones that ate cactus fruit had sharp beaks so they could pierce the cactus fruit's skin.

There are lots more finches with a huge variety of beaks.

Darwin wrote to his neighbor about a question about inbreeding.

Darwin's cousin was Emma Wedgewood, and Darwin's mother was also a Wedgewood.

That Wedgewood trait made Darwin's children very weak, as I said before, 3 died in their youth because of a sickness.

Every plant and animal has to go through natural selection if they want to make the most healthy child.

Populations can have way more offspring than food. This happens frequently if we feed the stray animals too much.

If a species separates enough, they can become two new different species. This is called Speciation.

A deer can use it's horns just to look intimidating.

Breeds of dogs are bred through Artificial Selection, which is when the humans choose what dogs should reproduce.

Before, the darker moths were only 5% of the peppered moths, but during the industrial selection.

There are 4 basic principles of natural selection.

If a trait is favorable, it will be passed on to the next generation of the species.

If a war kills a lot of people and there are only a few survivors, that would be another example of natural selection.

Natural Selection can also happen with plague, in a similar way to war.

Jesiah Wedgewood was a person that founded a really good pottery company.

Meiosis.

Offspring have half their mom's traits, half their dad's traits.

The male produces the sperm, and the female produces the egg.

Offspring have half of each of their parent's traits because of the process of mitosis.

Mitosis and Meiosis are similar.

All of your cells have 46 chromosomes.

Meiosis is like Mitosis, except twice.

The first stage of Meiosis is Prophase 1.

You and your brother would normally be different, except if you were identical twins.

Identical Twins! Shout out in the comments!

There are lots of stages in Meiosis, like Metaphase 1 and Telophase 1.

Meiosis marks a checkpoint between it with Cytokinesis.

There are more stages in Meiosis, including Prophase 2, Metaphase 2, Telophase 2, you get the point, don't you?

Finally, Meiosis finishes with another stage of Cytokinesis.

Half of your sperm( Of course, if you're a man) is female, half is male.

When (You know) happens, the sperm go into a crazy race to get to the egg.

The most common reproduction is sexual reproduction.

Sexual reproduction begins with sex cells.

We all have different sex cells.

The answer to the mystery of sexual reproduction is Meiosis.

Once again, there are so many reasons that you can't clone yourself.

If you took all the DNA from one of your parents, you would be a clone of them.

There are special cells that have only 23 cells, the sperm and the egg.

A special diploid cell splits in half two times in the process of Meiosis.

Part 1 and Part 2 of Meiosis are extremely similar in many ways.

Men produce sperm and women produce eggs after puberty begins.

If you want to know a good way to describe Meiosis, think of it as Mitosis, two times.

In the process of mitosis, the cells split into two cells with 46 chromosomes, but when those two cells split again, they become four cells, each with 23 chromosomes.

The vast majority of your cells can clone themselves.

If half of your cells were from your mom and half from your dad, you would look really weird.

Sperm and Egg cells are Haploid Cells.

All the stages of meiosis happen in mitosis too.

Each double chromosome has two chromatids.

In Meiosis, every copy is very, very different.

Double chromosomes trade their genetic codes in a process called recombination.

One of the pillars of natural selection is variation, so to speak.

Male cells have XY chromosomes, Female cells have XX chromosomes.

You need a Y chromosome to become a male.

Telophase 1 is the final stage of the first part of Meiosis.

After the first part of Meiosis, we have 2 haploid cells.

Next, in the second part of Meiosis, we will have 4 haploid cells, 2 male and 2 female.

All of the haploid cells produced in Meiosis are the same size, but they are going to be different in lots of ways.

Every human started as one tiny tiny cell.

Homologous means two cells have the same relation.

The egg is created when another cell splits into 4 but only 1 is used, the egg of course.

The other 3 cells are called Polar Bodies, and they are completely useless.

The first stage of Mitosis And Meiosis is Interphase.

In Prophase 1, the copies of the chromosomes stick to each other.

Your mother's chromosome' and your father's chromosomes' Xs get tangled up during Meiosis. All 4 chromatids will be different in lots of ways.

The 23rd pair of chromosomes will become part of your sex cells.

In Telophase 1, the nucleus duplicates itself.

In Cytokinesis, the cell completely duplicates itself.

Don't forget, Cytokinesis happens twice.

Prophase 2 is slightly different from Prophase 1.

At first, the egg in Meiosis splits into 1 egg and 1 polar body, after that, the egg splits into 1 egg and 1 polar body and the polar body splits into 2 polar bodies.

Lots of our sex cells are different.

Meiosis is also used by plants and animals which don't have live birth.

All of your body cells contain the same mix of DNA.

Only some cells can go through the process of mitosis.

Your sex cells are contained in your ovaries, if you are a woman, or your testes, if you are a man.

You were born to make life.

Men and women have to be a certain age before their sex cells are ready, there is a name for that stage of life, puberty, duh.

1 pair of your chromosomes will become your sex chromosomes.

You always end up with 4 cells in meiosis, but when you're a girl, the other 3 cells are useless, as you only need 1 egg.

It is amazing that you came from 1 cell. If you aren't surprised by this I don't know how to impress you.